09 April 2012

Writing and Commitments and Expectations

Stream of consciousness incoming...

The problem with writing is that it's sort of a commitment. If I were to write a piece about hockey today, just because of a whim, the problem is that it creates an expectation that I will write again. This applies to generally anything that you write. If I write a best selling novel, into which I have put every single ounce of everything that I can give, the expectation is that I will write another one, even though I may not have anything left to say. If I wrote a movie, there would be an expectation of a sequel. If all I did was write a poem to my wife, there would be an expectation of future poems, or maybe even, god forbid, a sonnet.

I certainly cannot begrudge that expectation. I do the same thing - I want a new post up on Puck Daddy, I want a new A Song of Ice and Fire book, I want another (good) series of Star Trek, just like anyone else. That expectation obviously places a pressure upon the creator of the media being consumed. For some reason, that pressure to actually write something, rather than writing because I enjoy doing it, makes it somewhat less fun for me, and I think that's a pretty silly thing for me to admit, but it's the truth.

Whereas George R. R. Martin has a legion of fans clamoring for another piece of the ASoIaF saga, it's not like I have a horde of people outside my door waiting for another post, whether it be for a hockey post, a novel, a movie, or even a poem. That pressure doesn't really exist, because I don't really have an audience to put that pressure on me.

So I guess it's all in my head, huh?

I'm the one who puts that pressure upon me. I'm the one who lets myself think its sort of stupid to write every once in a while, and that I should either jump in with both feet and write frequently, or not at all. That I should write something big and impactful, or not at all. That I should have always have something interesting and unique to say, or not at all.

And that's all bullshit. Writing is something I enjoy, and it's stupid to let myself ruin it. I enjoy writing, and I should pick it back up. I should write about whatever I want, whenever I want, and to hell with any bullshit expectation that I put on myself.

So I think I'm going to do that. I want to start writing regularly again, but I don't want to ruin it for myself. I've got a couple ideas, so I think I'll try to start over here. I almost feel like I should come up with a new website or something, but I guess that's just letting bullshit get in the way of actually writing. So here we go...

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